My beloved Milton,
It is surely time that you had your share of your old mammy's notice. I have been writing to the girls every few days, & knew you would learn from them all that was of interest. But now I feel like saying a few words to you separately. I am so disturbed about your money matters, that I can't be satisfied until we have a talk on the subject. I learn, by a letter from Louisa received yesterday, that the mortgage is transferred to old Mr. Cudlipp [or Cudliff], who is likely to grant you some indulgence. But how are you to raise the money? It seems to me that he might be induced to allow you to make small payments, as fast as you are able. Has Moore made any arrangements to pay his debt? If you can get hold of that money, I think you can get along.
I have no need of cash at present having on hand all I need for immediate use. Our expenses are moderate, as our good sister only allows me to pay for what things we, individually, use -- that is, groceries & medicines. I hire a stout young man, a family servant, to wait on Harvey: & I pay for my washing, etc.: So I am relieved of the feeling of being troublesome in regard to household arrangements. As to the care and attention which are so kindly bestowed by the family, no money could recompense that.
Dr. Griffin is to be here again in a day or two. Harvey has the utmost confidence in his skill, & is greatly pleased to have his care. He is most kind, & gives his whole mind, evidently, to the case. Yet the remedies from which he hoped so much have availed but little: some alleviation of the dropsical disease has followed. But no substantial improvement. His strength declines continually: he is no longer able to raise himself in bed, or even to change posture.
The most distressing thing, however, is the neuralgia which tortures him almost unceasingly. It is seated in the bowels mostly; tho' for the last few days, his left foot has given as much pain as the other part. I had to give him morphine three times last night, with scarcely any effect. It is terrible to witness his anguish, & yet not be able to mitigate it. He is constantly calling for his children, wanting to write to them with his own hand. Insists on my writing to you in his name, but can never remember what he would have said.
Tell Willie to come up, if possible, his father so longs to see him. Say to your mother that I have been wishing to write to her: but I have not the spirits to indite [compose] a cheerful letter, and don't want to write a gloomy one.
In the midst of my troubles, dear Milton, let me humbly acknowledge the unmerited goodness of God. He has set me all I needed, in kind friends; and has provided the aid I required in my poverty. I enclose you a letter from my nephew, which will show you all that I need, have no care as to a home. My brother Bev. [Beverly Randolph Johnston, 1804-1876] & John [her nephew John Warfield Johnston, 1818-1889?] have fixed everything for me, so as to free my mind from solicitude. I do not scruple to accept what they offer as they can spare it easily.
Shew the letter to the children. Harvey sends all the love he can express. Lucy & Charlotte [Charlotte Elizabeth Mitchell/Michel (1829-1921)] add theirs. Let me hear from you as soon as you can [write].
God bless you all, now & ever.
Your loving
J.W. Michel
[p.s.] Tell Willie to bring me some black Tea & a pint of whiskey. I can't get them good here.
[Jane Wood Johnston Mitchell/Michel at Wheatly, Bedford, Virginia, to John Milton Binckley at Washington City, 8th February 1866].
Original manuscript in the John Milton Binckley Papers, 1816-1943. Library of Congress Manuscript Division Washington, D.C. 20540 USA. This is my rough transcription.
Many thanks to William Myers for sending scanned copies of the documents from the Binckley papers, and also to Mary Davy and Sally Young for their assistance.
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